I know this is kind of a continuation post from my last one but I am finding myself thinking where to start, where to start? But like with cleaning or cooking when I am overwhelmed, sometimes I just dive in for the plunge. And that's exactly my game plan for my post about ...
It might sound a little weird, like something from a "Twilight" movie but truthfully, I think it is such a beautiful approach to such a life changing experience. Birth itself. Something that I would have thought about a couple years ago and felt such terror and fear. My mother has gave birth, not me, anyone but me! "Oh when I am pregnant it will be different, my baby will just pop into my arms with sparkles all around us. No pain, no stretch marks, no gaining 40 pounds. Not me. No way!".... Until I missed that period. Until suddenly, somehow it clicked.
I, Challice Glee,
CAN DO THIS.
Before the 1900's nearly all births were at home with trusted midwives. They really focused on the mother as whole, not just her birth canal. They cared for her in a way that would nourish her well being and did not see birth as a "serious medical condition". That label was reserved for unwell people in hospitals. After all, having a baby is a bodily function, a POWERFUL one, but just simply that! Yet as scientific advances grew, giving birth was dubbed an interesting subject that the all-male doctors at the time felt the need to scientifically analyze, "improve" and eventually control it. Once birth slowly started switching from the mother being in control, to her surrendering control to her doctor in the 1800's, tools that were never used before started coming into the picture. Things like forceps, which were only previously used to remove stillbirths, entered the arena to make it "easier". C-sections were starting to be used more, which were traditionally only used on mothers who had passed away or were going to pass away. Why did women start losing faith in themselves?
It simply became a status issue. Like iPhones and cars today, somehow birth became about who had money. There was a yin-yang effect by the 1900's. Doctors had learned so much more about complications, and how to fix them, for such a heavy price. It became "fashionable" for women of wealth to choose to birth at the hospital simply because at the time expectant mothers rarely left their homes. It seems to me it was simply a rebellious fashion (I mean, who would want to be confined for months upon months?) and if you had the money for it, you could not only leave your house to be in the maternity wards, but have your baby there. Oh isn't that fancy? Now at this point, that's not so bad! There was a safe feeling being in the presence of trained medical staff. I know when I am at my ultimate low and have to go to the hospital, when those automatic doors open I know I am all the closer to feeling better... so it's understandable how women headed in this direction. Who doesn't want to feel better when you are feeling bad? Which leads to my next topic of ...
Now that women started birthing in hospitals it was expected that during their births they would "feel better".
It makes sense considering doctors are in control of medication right? Why not make it a little less painful? An answer to these mother's pleas were coming soon, with a storm of poor choices of medication. The method was called "Twilight Sleep" and it was only for those who could afford it. If they would pay up they were promised a painless birth with this method, and here came the drugs. Laboring moms were given a hefty shot of morphine and next some amnesiac scopolamine. The combo was supposed to make it painless and for the mother and to have no memory of the birth. As if that wasn't enough, next they gave the mother a good whiff of chloroform. Yes, this really happened and was totally accepted as normal less than 100 years ago. So just because "that is what's normal" doesn't mean it's right. As moms, I think we should really be thinking a lot more for ourselves. Get to know the facts. The sad thing is, doctors initially said these drugs were not fit for the use of expectant mothers, but the moms kept pushing for there use. It seems like such a horrible choice right? But to relate it to a common day "bad for you" phenomenon, we have soda, candy, smoking, liquor, and the list goes on. Yet we still want these things and pursue them. I don't think they are going to go away any time soon. To read more about "Twilight Sleep" you could go here! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twilight_sleep
Sadly we still have not learned from a lot of our past mistakes. Since the earth began all the way up until the 1900's we birthed differently. I believe for the most part we birthed naturally and normally. Humans are still around right? So isn't there something to that? Now C-section rates in hospitals have sky rocketed to over 30 percent and the number is still climbing. Most of the time mothers who end up having a C-section did not plan it, their births were simply not "happening fast enough" for the doctors. What are these doctors in such a rush for that they can't let nature take it's course? Late to their dinner date? Their favorite show is on? I just don't understand. I don't think you should be in "the business of birth" if you are there to rush it. I feel doctors should be in love with what they do, not see it as burden.
This is why Jared and I are going to do everything in our power
to keep our family out of the hospital for births.
We don't want medication to speed the process.
We don't want medication to numb my body.
I don't want to be restrained to a bed in an awkward position.
We don't want specialists and nurses interrupting.
We don't want to be rushed.
I just want to feel everything without fear.
I want to know what is happening in my own body.
I want to understand that this isn't so much pain, as it is my incredible body getting ready.
I want Onyx to join us when HE is ready.
I want a pure birth.
I know this is my first child.
I know that not everything will go as planned.
I know that under certain circumstances I must accept change.
And I know that if I do have to take a medication or be transferred to a hospital,
I have to know that I tried.